Looking Forward to Connection (in the time of Pandemic)

looking forward to the day when i can be in communities.. and have connection.. esp with people i meet along the way.... these are the anecdotes and history of my years and love with photography..

a masked world has made it harder.. it's not just the isolation of being at home,.. it is the huge separation of people in the public domaine.... you can't see smiles, or hurt or joy or anger. sometimes faintly... there are no pauses.. it's move on. stand back... it IS what we need to do , but i willl be so happy and joyous when those freedoms of the past return

Rememberances

Remembrance.........

yesterday 3054 ppl died.. more than pearl harbor, 911 , katrina....

it's painful to hear... and worse to be confronted with ppl who say it's a hoax, they are dying of co-morbidities not Covid. of course those things dont help but without Covid too they would not have died.... i have heard this twice recently... it's all i can do but stand up and scream.. the audacious selfishness is astounding

today i just want to keep the 105,000 ppl in the hospital.. field hospitals, hospitals in parking lots in my good thoughts

Re-examination of Cancer Portfolio

one of the things i've been focused on during this pandemic is to sort through a ton of work; to edit, to update web and to reflect...... eventually tying the threads together of the same and different portfolios..

bc there is an abundance of work it feels overwhelming at times. i uncover new / old images.. what resonated once might not be the one that resonates now.. as we evolve our perspective and inner responses change

One of the hardest portfolios for me is one out of two done during my Cancer years.... one actually wading through the most difficult time of my life... the other to be seen later on.. is the life of my wigs.. both of which i named.. (Lola and Esmerelda)

it’s so hard to look at things that bring you back in time to a place you didn't want to stare down even then.. i recognize now how much i protected myself.. creating some psychological barriers.. one was having a lot of humor, even about myself..... listening to others woes..not my own.....and the other was finding the peace and honesty in just being in the moment.. quiet. stillness... alone

interestingly enough.. those two hard years, informed me so much, that when Covid-19 hit and we had to isolate and be separate from those we loved... i had already had this experience..not totally isolated(my friends and family were very much present).... but dropping out of my life so to speak to fight...being home and much of the time alone..

this was one of those quiet times.. when i saw something as i got out of bed and knew i had to grab my camera to shoot this singular moment

Arm in Arm

your eyes are so bright,.. your faint smile indicative of your warm heart... it is that i found when i met you on the street...

we stayed arm in arm for a very long time.. walking along.......... you and moments like this are what keeps my soul on fire

Guatemala...another place that feels home to me

Rejoice

REJOICE.......... the sounds of reasonable, intelligible voices.. what a gift ...

we deserve this release and exaltation......

I feel so so grateful.....

After The Fires... Sonoma County

after the fires... Sonoma County

driving up and down dirt roads where one of my son’s friend lost his place and the whole area in which he lived burned....80 acres.... clearing the landscape...

even burned and brown i can imagine its magnificence prior.... and what i hope in the future will recover ... the land and wild landscape...

it is overwhelming to see what Fire can do.... after being here three times since 2017 after the fires and taking images.. and walking amongst the remains..i feel how deeply painful it is.... it's hard to lose a home.. but it's the belonging of memories.... things that are irreplaceable that are so moving........ one can rebuild, but you can not recover.. family albums. and treasures of history from a life time.. to see the remains of just a standing hearth, pictures on a wall and a found mug, or items on the ground charred . it literally takes my breath away.... i stare with disbelief what mother nature can do....

i am humbled.. and yet honored to come ... and bear witness to this tragedy again and again..not forgotten just because the fire was put out...

coming from the North East.. i have never experienced this....

one nite we lost power for a few days bc of gale force winds.. i packed up everything i had put it in the car and was prepared to leave..... it subsided on day two and we were good to go...blue skies , warm temps as if it never happened........ but i can’t imagine living with this.. being on guard and ready during october.. i guess like they do in the islands during hurricane season....

before 2017 there were no fires for many years..... one can’t know if this is what it will be moving forward.... and should one go or stay.. it would be hard to uproot from a community of friends and a life..

me i go home to NY but to see .. witness ... it lasts like a scar

Full Of Bliss

Last sunday morning bovina, ny

while a city girl.. i love the country ...the sea just as much......
i spent my college years in New Hampshire... unknown to many, i actually was in Ag school surrounded by cows ...I had dreams to be a vet, then a midwife.. long story why neither happened... )..
and so when i come up here to my brothers i love all the silos and barns..... he has a wonderful old barn..... and property... and i have to say what a break from the insanity of this world. covid,politics, fire.. all things pressing on my chest and creating anxiety.............

here i walk all over the property.. as an eagle soars above.. the fog lifts over the pond.... i walk to the barn. art studio... ride in a golf cart bumping over everything and laughing.. singing..... and i forget..... and I remember what it feels like to be full of bliss...

Singing in The Rain

Happiness is....... singing in the rain.. dancing in the rain... running in the rain.... omg.. blissssssss haven't done it since a kid.....

then a nice warm yummy shower.... Life!